Grit
This morning, I was thinking about the topic of grit, related to my older daughter Jordan. She’s 22 and just graduated as an environmental engineer from Lehigh University! (Woot-Woot!) She likes to joke that she was voted by the kids in her major, “The most likely to fail the test, and the most likely to get the job!” And it’s true.
Jordan is one of the grittiest people I’ve ever met. She bit my boob and thus weaned herself at four months. At age 10, when asked what she wanted to be, without blinking an eye she declared herself “Ruler of the world.” Despite having some real gifts, she also had some real challenges: ADD, learning disabilities, and also a sister with serious mental health challenges. Jordan also possesses a deep sensitivity, which compelled her to become fully vegetarian at age 13 and she never looked back. She just could not bring herself to eat animals. This sensitivity called her to be an environmental engineer, so she could essentially heal the planet.
So what does this have to do with grit? Well, Jordan got herself into an amazing college and got through a highly rigorous engineering program, despite her learning disabilities. Every class and every semester was challenging for her. Then, last summer she came down with a nasty bone infection that required surgery, daily IV infusions, and a long painful healing protocol. But she started her internship anyway. I would drive her into NYC, where she got on her crutches picc-line and all, and made her way up to the 28th floor of a New York City high-rise to do her job. When she was able to, she commuted on a bus in and out of the city on crutches, making her way from Port Authority up to Broadway in a sea of moving people. She has also experienced many other losses over this past year including her senior year sorority life because Lehigh shut down all Greek life for the first half of this past semester. Now with COVID-19, she has lost all of her senior activities, graduation, and is now facing yet another summer in lockdown. AND....she’s not even whining, sniveling, or complaining (too much!) All of this takes a whole lotta grit in my opinion!
Let’s look at another version of grit. As many of you know, my younger daughter Courtney had a long and winding ride on the awful Krazy train of teenage mental illness. At the age of 13, she began to battle serious internal demons that literally stopped the course of her life in its tracks. Before these internal demons took up residence in her mind, her gift and her joy was singing. Her mental illness took that joy away. The terrible things Courtney experienced and endured during that time, no parent would ever allow if there was a choice in the matter. Now, after coming out the other side of five long years of battling debilitating anxiety and depression, Courtney is not only joyously singing again, but has also chosen to co-found the KrazyGirl project with me. Her determination to become well, and I also believe a loving force of grace, has allowed her to evolve into the young woman she is today, and is a prime example of grit.
We all struggle with something extremely challenging, whether it’s internal, external, circumstantial, physical, or relational. We must stop pretending that we aren’t struggling if we are. Challenge and struggle do not make us lesser people. These are the trials that form us into the people we chose to be. I believe if we shift the focus–~ from the struggle itself to the response to the struggle– everything changes. How we see ourselves, how we see each other, and the skills we bring to the table to manage and overcome our challenges, are the factors that will come to define us. Remember our tagline:“We’re all a little Krazy, it’s what we do with our Krazy that counts.”
Inner strength, fortitude, tenacity, and grit are the determining factors between what we are going through and what we are able to achieve, and the difference between Krazy or #KrazyEmpowered.
Xxoo Marci